We all know that frustrating feeling of being blocked; of being in a place where you feel stuck, lost or confused about where you're at on your journey. There's that niggling feeling that something needs to change,but you don't quite know what it is yet. Or, perhaps you already know what needs to change, but you're too scared to take action. Time and time again, you come across road blocks that stop you from making any progress, even when you think you're doing everything in your power to try and move forward.
The key to removing these blocks?
The definition of real, according to the dictionary is: not imitation or artificial; genuine.
Now, can you honestly say that right now, you are being 100% real? If you're feeling blocked at all - in any area of your life - then it's very likely that you're not (even if you think you are). Let's explore this a little further, while I give you examples of how you can be real, and in the process, remove those nasty blocks!
1. Who are you, really?
Ask yourself this question and be brutally honest. Try not to use labels or words that describe what you do, because you are so much more than that. You may be a parent or a teacher, follow a certain religion or be part of a sporting team, but once again, you are more than that, too. This question needs to be answered on a soul level. Who are you, in all your entirety?
2. What are you passionate about?
What gives you that warm, fuzzy, excited feeling inside? What could you talk about for hours on end? Is there something that you just want to know more and more about? Are you actively doing something about this passion, or do you see it as just a dream?
3. What are you not saying?
What are the things that you're not speaking up about? Are you bottling up unexpressed feelings or not talking about your true beliefs out of fear of judgment? Is there something that you know deep down needs to be said? Ask yourself why you aren't speaking your truth.
4. Are all of your relationships (family included) healthy and do you have clear boundaries in place? Do you let others treat you poorly or do they have unrealistic expectations of you? Are there people in your life with whom you walk on eggshells just to keep the peace?
Do you feel comfortable being yourself around these people? It may be time to reconsider who is on this journey with you, and whether or not they have a role in your life that serves your highest good. It's okay to remove toxic people from your life. Yes, even family. In cases where you simply must maintain contact with family members, you can still cut the energetic cords between you.
5. Are you happy with your job?
Your job, career, study plans, day to day routine... whatever you want to call it based on your own situation, you always have a choice. If you're unhappy getting up every morning because you don't genuinely look forward to your day each day, then something's got to change. Again, it may be an expectation of others that you 'keep at it', but does that fulfil your needs, or theirs?
6. What are you afraid of?
I'm not going to give you the whole, "fear is just a thought" lecture, because everyone knows that already, and if you're genuinely feeling fearful, then compassion is what is needed. I will let you know however, that whatever your fears are, you can and will overcome them, if you make the conscious decision to do so. There is always support out there and people willing to help you to face this fear, so when you're ready, ask for help- it's one of the most courageous things you can do. And, for those of you whose fear is the unknown, please know this. The unknown is where the real magic happens. True story.
7. What or who do you need to let go of?
The possible answers to this question are endless - relationships (of any kind), patterns of behaviour, pain from the past, guilt, regret, unhealthy thoughts and environments... you get my drift. It simply must be done if you want to live authentically. The key to letting go however, is not just saying, "ok I let go of this, this and that". You have to be brutally honest with yourself and truly, wholeheartedly, Let. It. The. Fuck. Go. Letting go means that it is gone; never to return, never to be dwelled over or engaged in again. If you're not ready to confront something, then you're not ready to release it.
8. Do you love yourself?
I mean really, truly love very aspect of yourself? When you look in the mirror, do you stand there proudly, knowing you are your whole, beautiful damn self? When you talk about yourself to others, or to yourself, are you positive and speak about yourself with love? Do you hold your head high and face the world with eyes wide open? Do you truly believe that you are deserving of love, respect, and greatness? Do you recognise how powerful you are and allow yourself to use it?
9. What do you feel is missing from your life?
I'm not talking about a new car, a massive house, or some piece of jewellery here. I'm talking about asking yourself what you feel is missing on a soul level. What do you yearn for? What keeps drawing you in? That ache in your heart, the missing puzzle piece- what is it? And why aren't you doing everything in your power to go after it?
10. Are you ready to embrace change?
What are you willing to do about all of the above? Being your real, unfiltered self takes courage, because not everyone is going to like being confronted with such a powerful, authentic being (it's their problem, not yours, by the way, and they're probably wishing they could be as brave as you).
If you want to remove your blocks, start with these questions. I guarantee you, that if you're courageous enough (which I know you are) to address even one of these questions, you'll begin to notice those heavy, confusing blocks lifting away, as if by magic.
You've got this. All you need to do, is be who you really are.